Bouncing Back From Life's Challenges: How Resilient Are You?
One of the facts of life is that, even for those who have had the best of childhoods, there is always going to be challenge after challenge, year after year. The loss of a loved one, serious illness or injury, a difficult childhood, job loss, assault, poverty, terrorist attacks, and other traumatic events are examples of very difficult life experiences. How do people cope with challenging events that change their lives? Can strength be taught? What does it take to survive and thrive? Resiliency is not about invincibility. In fact, it may often involve struggling mightily with wounds, scars, and strengths to show for it.
The word, 'resiliency' is derived from Latin roots meaning, "to jump (or bounce) back". Resilience refers to the ability to adapt well in the face of tragedy, threats, trauma, and adversity. It means 'bouncing back' from difficult experiences, despite the presence of emotional pain or sadness. The 
American Psychological Association Help Center (2004) has a featured topic, The Road to Resiliency. It notes that resilience involves actions, thoughts, and feelings that can be learned and developed in us all. There are many strategies that can be used. Cultural differences may be reflected in the variation of strategies that are considered. The American Psychological Association (2004) outlines ten ways to build resilience which include:
1. Make connections and positive relationships with friends, close family members or others. Resilience is strengthened by the support given from those who care and listen. Most resilient people do not do it alone. They ask for help or recruit others.
2. Try not to look at a crisis as something you cannot deal with. It is important to check how you interpret and react to events.
3. Accept that change is a part of living. Focus on what you can change.
4. Take steps towards your goals. Make goals realistic. Small steps in a forward direction are key.
5. Take decisive actions as much as you can rather than simply wishing llife was different.
6. Be on the lookout for opportunities for self-discovery. Struggles can ultimately add to your growth, increase self worth, and build upon a sense of appreciation for life.
7. Keep a positive view of yourself. Work at building your confidence in your skills to address problems and trusting your ability to build resilience. Believe in yourself and recognize your strengths.
8. Keep things in perspective. Remember to look at the long term perspective. Foster your ability to perceive bad times as temporary. Faith in the future is essential. Avoid making the event larger than life or seeing no way out.
9. Maintain a hopeful, positive outlook. Strive to expect that good things will happen. Keep in mind what it is that you want.
10. Take care of yourself by participating in activities that you enjoy and find relaxing. Taking care of yourself helps your body and mind to work with clarity and strength in the midst of challenge.
In closing, the importance of mapping the power of the human soul is found in the poignant statement made by Martin Luther King, Jr. "We must accept finite disappointment, but never lose infinite hope."
RESOURCES
*Try Nan Henderson's Resiliency Quiz to better understand your resiliency
*An excellent readable book on resiliency is, Wolin, S.& Wolin, S.
(1993). The resilient self: How survivors of troubled families rise above adversity. Villard Books: New York.
Wolin & Wolin also have a web site:
http://www.projectresilience.com
© Judy Chew, Ph.D. Psychologist
